Bruce and An(n)a, and The Circle of Life

Last Saturday was a tough day for Sherryl.  She began to feel "weird" early afternoon and, a few hours later, she wouldn't wake when one of us gently touched her shoulder and called her name.  We were scared because we didn't think Sherryl was going to make it through the night.  A little after 9:00pm, we called Hospice.  We were told a nurse would arrive at the house in about 45 minutes.  As promised, the nurse arrived at the door soon after our call: a male with a pleasant smile.  We introduced ourselves to him before taking him back to Sherryl's bedroom.  And he introduced himself to us.  "My name is Bruce," he said.  Not a common name, Bruce was our father's first name, too.

Once in the bedroom, Bruce stood over Sherryl, got her to respond to him, then answered our questions and gave his advice.  "Follow her lead," he told us.  "Continue to do what you're doing so she is comfortable."  And so we did.  Comfort care. 

Sherryl made it through the night and early Sunday, Nadine heard Sherryl calling her name loudly.  Sherryl had spilled her cup of juice and needed help.  She had the strength to reach for the cup, to try to take a sip, and then to shout Nadine's name -- quite a difference from not responding to us the night before.  As late as this morning, Sherryl continues to have moments when she's nearly as chatty as she's ever been.  Although her appetite has been close to nil, she enjoyed some applesauce yesterday and she continues to drink lots of liquids.

A different nurse from Hospice visited Sherryl today to assess and address medical needs.  And then an aid visited Sherryl to help her with non-medical care.  Sherryl felt relaxed and calm, and floated into another nap after being cared for by the aid.  The aid had a cheerful demeanor, she was very tender, and her name was Ana.  Our mother's name was Anna, too, with a minor difference in the way it was spelled.

And so, just as she was during the first months of her life, Sherryl  has now been in the adept and compassionate care of Bruce and An(n)a.  The circle of life.  It's always there, and you don't need to look very far to find it.

Nadine and I cried together on the phone later Sunday morning.  We were relieved that Sherryl had made it through the night and that some of her strength had returned.  And we believe it wasn't a coincidence that a caring human being  who had the same name as our father had joined us in our childhood home to help us with what we needed.  Vulnerable little girls again, Daddy had arrived.  "Mom and Dad are here," we sobbed on the phone.  "They're coming to  take their little girl, to help her find her way."  And then, although it couldn't be farther from the truth but the notion was just absurd enough to lend much-needed comic relief to the moment, we began to laugh hysterically. "Sure, Sherryl gets the personal escort! They'd send a bus for us!"

For Dad, who sailed the oceans of this world, one of Sherryl's favorite songs.

~xoxo~

Comments

[Jodi Gochberg]

How sweet to have two people that will be helping Sherryl have your parents name. Having those names in your lifes at this time must be a comfort to all of you,for they were such wonderful parents and lovely people.I believe they are comforting Sherryl and you all as angels standing beside you all the time. My family and I are thinking of Sherryl and you all everyday and want you to know we love you all and please tell Sherryl we love her everyday. Please tell her I am always here for her and just know she is in my heart always. I love her dearly.

[Andrea Matheny]

I woke up this morning thinking about you - all of you - and saw Nadine's Facebook page today. I don't know what else to say right now except I love you all. Please let Sherryl know I'm thinking of her at this moment. Love, Andi

[Jamie L. Jones]

Hi Arleen,
The few times I've been on the course site this week, I've been acutely aware of your absence, and I know that this must be a hard time for you and your family. You have been present in my thoughts and prayers all week, and I just wanted to take the time to make sure you know that. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you.
Jamie